Eulogy for Daddy Sophie...From Mommy Sophie...

Being in the military and being a military wife in one equates to a tedious and adventurous life. But this also equates to sleepless nights once our respective husbands go on deployment...Here was the last message my dear friend Mommy Sophie (LTJG Aemy Leslie Campos-Damian) read, the night before Daddy Sophie (1LT FRANCIS DAMIAN PA) was buried... 

Note: This letter/message was posted with permission...

"I am amazed with how my husband has touched many lives while he was still alive. Pero mas nakakataba ng puso na higit na maraming na-inspire kahit sa kanyang pagkawala.

            ”Dadi, nasa frontpage tayo.”

·         Nais ko pong kunin ang pagkakataong ito upang sabihin ang matagal na dapat naming sinabi ni Chikko.

To Mommy Sol and Daddy Bing, Mama and Papa, SORRY.

            Chikko and I are sincerely sorry for not being able to begin our journey with you. We stepped on to another significant path without your knowledge and consent. We know we caught you by surprise and we could not be more grateful for the unconditional love you’ve given us. Without ifs and buts, you accepted and understood our decisions. You showed us the kind of parenting we wish to pass on to our dear Cheeky - the kind that is patient, just, keeps no record of wrongs, always protects, trusts, hopes, and perseveres. You taught us that love prospers when one forgives.

·         Dear friends, Chikko and Chick… our not-so-ordinary love story is a tale to be told… a story that in time, Cheeky will come to understand.  Our love story will make you laugh; it will make you cry. It will make you believe that no matter how you run away, the Lord will always lead you to the one He has prepared for you. With the incomparable happiness Chikko has given me, our love will always be worth all the pain.

·         Much has been said about the heroism of Chikko and of how amazing he is as a brave warrior for the country. But to me and Cheeky, he will always be “Dadi Sophie.” I have realized that more than the grief of losing him, there is also the searing pain brought by the tug of familiarity and the what-could’ve-beens.

            Mamimiss ko ‘yung morning messages niya na: “How is my Momi and Cheeky?” Pag low morale ako, may mga hirit siyang “Okay lang ‘yan Momi, basta may pumapasok pa sa ATM” o ‘yung “Life is already hard, Momi, why make it harder.” Francis was like that… alam niya kung paano kami patatawanin at patatahanin. Nung binyag ni Sophie, he surprised us when he arrived a day earlier than his supposed flight. When I opened the door, andun na siya sa labas ng bahay with his usual charming smoulder.

  

            Mabibilang man sa mga daliri ko ang mga pagkakataong nagkasama sila ni Sophie, Chikko made sure every moment was memorable. Bago pa man siya makagraduate sa Airborne Course niya, gustong-gusto na niya magpadeploy sa Zamboanga. At isa sa mga dahilan ay kami ni Sophie. Higit sa pagtupad ng kanyang tungkulin bilang kawal ng bayan, pinanindigan niya ang pagiging Dadi kay Sophie. 

            Upon landing in EAAB, he said, “Momi, san kayo? Makita ko man lang sandali ang Momi ko at ang Baby Girl ko. Diyan na lang sa NavForWem, before ako pumunta sa TCP ng LRB. Wag sa bahay kasi nakafull battle gear na ako. Pwede dalhin mo lang sandali ang baby girl, Momi? Kung hindi, kahit ikaw na lang momi ang makita ko bago madeploy. Naks, parang pelikula lang.”

·         I knew in my heart that Chikko would have been the best father. He would’ve introduced our God to her, carried Sophie around whenever he had the chance, taken photos of her as she grows, given her the world, taught her how to play a sport or a musical instrument, accompanied her on her first day of class and picked her up from school every day; napahirapan pa sana niya ang mga magtatangkang manligaw sa baby girl namin; he would’ve come up the stage every graduation day. Chikko would’ve walked her down the aisle, kissed her cheeks, and gave her his blessing; he would’ve watched our grandchildren grow up to be as beautiful as her.

·         When his battle bag was handed over to me, I could not stop myself from crying. I saw three (3) precious items in it:

-       First, his phone, ang wallpaper ay kami ni Cheeky. 

-       Second, Sophie’s bib na ninakaw niya. Hindi ko napansing kinuha niya pala ‘yun during our visit to Cheeky’s pedia for her vaccination. Walang laba yung bib puno pa ng suka ni Cheeky, yun ang inaamoy nya to remind him of our little girl and he carries it everwhere he goes.

-       Lastly, I found a book about being a “Father to a Daughter,” life lessons on raising a girl. I could imagine my husband reading through the book during his free time, understanding every advice there was in it, longing for a chance to apply every single piece that it said.

I turned to a page which stated that the five (5) keys to raising a girl are:

1.    Always be involved in her life.

2.    Respect and honor her mom.

3.    Treasure every moment with her.

4.    Pray for her everyday.

            In the span of time that he was with us, Chikko did all of the above. The last one struck me the most… it said:

5.    Be her hero.

            Francis may not be physically present anymore to defend and protect our baby girl; to give her a comforting hug or kiss whenever she’s afraid; and to sing her a lullaby until she falls asleep. But I am confident that he will always be there for our baby, guiding her from above.

            He is not just the country’s hero… he is our daughter’s hero; he is and will always be my hero.

·         I have to admit. I am overwhelmed by this challenge. Ang huling for compliance ko lang kasi kay Chikko ay mejas na Biofresh o Burlington, tapos foot powder at Fungisol. Ngayon, I am not just Momi Sophie, I have to be Dadi Sophie as well.

            Pero pangako ko sa’yo dadi, I will raise Sophie the way we wanted her to be. I will make sure that your dream for our baby Sophie will be fulfilled. I promise that she will know you better day by day. When the time comes, she will proudly tell the world that she is our daughter and that 1LT. FRANCIS G. DAMIAN of the Philippine Army, a hero of the Filipino nation, is her father.

·         I would like to take this chance to thank everyone who condoled with us in this moment of grief. Thank you for all your concern and sympathies. The coming days will be hard. While Chikko victoriously won in his fight, it is now our time to face another battle - that of letting go and beginning a new journey. Armed with faith and prayers, we will get by.

·         As I end this, allow me to share with you a few lines from the last song dadi Sophie sang to me…

            “I am all alone without you. My days are dark without the glimpse of you. But now that you came into my life, I feel complete. The flowers bloom, my morning shines, and I can see…”

            He may not be here anymore, but his reassuring voice will always be in my mind. He will always complete the song of my heart.

            I love you dadi, I will always do… till we meet again."

One Minute Prayer

Years back when I was still a cadet, I wrote an article bearing the same title as this blog post :"One Minute Prayer." The content behind that article was my late mistah, Cadet First Class Reenan Ferrer. It was a post written out of sadness and feeling of loss of a good friend and brother. Reenan suffered from Meningitis which eventually led to respiratory infection.

Photo Courtesy

Last week, September 19, was another heartbraking day for our Class. Another life turned to dust as my mistah, 1LT Kristopher John Rama PA died defending peace in Zamboanga City.

Proud.

It makes me swollen with pride to hear success stories of my classmates who are deployed in far flung areas in the country combating insurgency and contributing to the peace of our motherland. It also makes me proud how the Filipino people are now being enlightened to the current situation in the country and not easily being affected by the various propaganda. The Filipinos now are wiser.

Sad.

"It is not everyday that we are snappy." That is my motto when I became an active officer of the AFP. Not all ideas may be accepted but keep sharing; not all operations will easily be won but keep going; and, the saddest part, not all soldiers (officers and enlisted personnel) that will be sent to battle will come back alive but for the ones left, keep on fighting.

Mistah, bok...you will be remembered.

 

To all my fallen mistahs who have sacrificed their lives for the Filipinos to be safe, 2LT Domingo PA, 2LT Quibuyen, 2LT Tutanes and now 1LT Rama, may your souls find happiness.

Happy Fathers Day Warriors! {Greetings}

June 16, 2013 gives me a bittersweet feeling as the whole world celebrates Fathers Day while I get restricted for a month due to the exigencies of my chosen profession. I have read this special poem written by Miss Karen Marshall dedicated to all daddies and military brats. 

"A Military Child"
by Karen Marshall

Away from the home of her childhood, she marched at her Daddy's side.

For her momma chose a wide and winding road when she became a bride.

And sometimes the road was a hard one, so different from what she had planned;

And sometimes she wept for the home she had left as she lay in a foreign land;

And sometimes her steps would grow weary as she followed the drum and the horn;

But she set about making the world her home because she was military born.

Mom learned to build a hearth for them wherever her dad was sent;

And she knelt to plant a garden every time he pitched their tent.

Yes she always planted a garden though she never saw it grow,

For she knew before the flowers came that she would have to go.

But she left each garden gladly though it made her heartbeat wild,

For she hoped it might bring comfort to another military child.

To the hardships in her young sweet life she learned one simple truth,

A promise that once was spoken in the ancient words of Ruth:

"Wherever you go, I will go. Wherever you lodge, I will lodge;

Thy people shall be my people and thy God shall be my God."

She shared Dad's joys and sorrows as she lived where the military bid,

For she was proud Dad was a soldier

And she, a military kid.

_____

To my dear husband who has always been there through thick and thin; who has always been patient despite two post partum scenarios I have gone through; who has been the duty diaper changer while I took some rest from the caesarian section operation and who has always been the son and son-in-law in one whom my parents dreamed of....HAPPY FATHERS DAY Tatay....

An Open Letter for my Mother {Post Mothers Day Give-Away Contest}

"A Mothers Love is like a rose. Each passing day, it grows and grows."

Mama,

For 18 years, I have been dependent on you until I entered cadetship. I do appreciate all the things you did and are still doing for me mama . I knew how critical it was for your health to conceive but still, you chose to keep me and be tied in that bed for those long months of pregnancy. Boredom may have visited you often but you sacrificed almost all of your life just to give birth to me safely. 

As a child I saw your strength and weaknesses as a mother at the same time. You were always there when I needed a private nurse; a tutor (though you were really strict); a cook (thanks for the recipes I inherited from you); a best friend (the very best friend that will always be there no matter what life throws against me); and being my greatest confidante who never judges but understands the situation then give advice instead.

I also saw you cry for me (though you never knew). I saw you hurting as I got my first heartbreak. I saw you having butterflies in your stomach as I share you my wonderful experiences. You were my alter-ego mama (have you noticed it?). 

When I graduated from the academy, our relationship dwindled a bit maybe because of the distance. I knew you longed for my voice and our long talks. But since I already have a taste of independence, I did learn to keep some of my problems to myself not because I do not to share it with you anymore but because, I know mama that it will not be forever that you will be there for me. Time will come that I will have my own family and that I have to fix my own problems on my own. You kept mum but at the end of the day, I learned how proud you are that I am now all grown up living the way you wanted me to be.

Mama, we are not rich but you and Papa raised me well that though I was your only begotten daughter, I learned that as a person that we just can't have it all and that if you want something, I have to work hard for it. That lesson I did use in the academy and that same lesson I am still adhering to now really helped me. I learned to soar high yet be contented of what the good Lord offers; to work passionately for the profession I have chosen; to be happy for the achievements of others; to not be eaten by the system as I go up to the ladder of success; and to be humble always. 

Now that I already have my own kids, you are still there to assist me. I am not a perfect daughter but you have been a perfect mother for me. Thank you for everything mama. Thank you for always being my guide. Thank you for all the love and understanding. I love you...Happy Mother's Day....

                                                                                                                Vee

As a tribute to all the mothers, Mommy Glaiza of Moomy Musings and I are hosting this post-Mothers Day Give-Away Contest. To join, just follow the steps that was prepared for you via Rafflecopter. Good luck and a Happy Mothers Day/Month to all mommies!!!

.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

A Junior Officer's Prayer

God I thank You for the opportunity to serve my countrymen and nation.

For the logic, knowledge and skills You lent me that I use in my everyday work.

For the heart to listen to what my men has to say.

As I come to You Lord, I humbly ask...

That I may use everything you have given me in doing what is only right.

That I may preserve humility despite the accolades You have bestowed upon me.

That I may only follow the legal orders even my own career will be at stake.

That I may only idolize people around me who really contribute to the betterment of the service and follow what You are asking us to do...serve in accordance to Your will.

That I may stay upright and never dwindle.

That as I climb up the ladder of ranks, I will never be a power-tripper leader.

And that I learn and master the art of balancing my family and profession.

May You keep me safe and my comrades dear Lord.

May You forgive me on my shortcomings as Your daughter.

In Jesus name I pray...

AMEN

“Why I Love Being a Mom and Blogger”

     This is an official entry to Dainty Mom’s Bloggy Goodies Contest, in celebration of the Dainty Mom blog’s 2nd anniversary. 

STABILITY UNDER PRESSURE

     For five years, I stayed in the portals of the Philippine Military Academy. Prior to where I am now, never did I imagine that I will enter the military, marry an army officer or become a soldier mom. I was just a carefree UP student maximizing my time as teenager. But as they say, the only thing constant in this world is change.

PMA Class 2008 Midshipmen, now Naval Officers of the Philippine Navy

     My world turned just like an ordinary wheel. I went on AWOL from UP Baguio and took the risk in entering the academy. My adventurous life didn’t end there. I was turned back due to medical condition and I felt like I was a failure. But because of the support of my parents, I survived the succeeding four years in the academy and am now a naval officer. Aside from the support that my family gave me, we were taught that despite the various physical and mental activities that we undergo in the academy, we remain focused and calm and that is termed “stability under pressure.” We must not treat problems as problems but we must treat it as a challenge to keep moving.

During Garden Wedding, December 18, 2010
From the Left: My FIL Papa Mario, My MIL Mama Becca,Me, My husband Glin Mar,
My Father Papa Jun, and my mother Mama Noemi.

     At the end of the day, despite the hardships I have experienced, I’m thankful that I made that journey. Why? Aside from the academic achievement, PMA is also the place where I met my husband, who is also a graduate of the academy and is currently serving the Army. We had our civil marriage last 28 January 2010, which was followed by a garden wedding on 18 December at Lisland Rainforest Resort Urdaneta, Pangasinan same year. Yes, you read it right; we got married two times in 2010.

     I thought that being in the service is already intricate. But being an army wife or being a soldier’s wife for that matter is I think unique. You think double or triple maybe about the safety of your husband and your family. You pray nth times a day. And you become tougher than anybody else, not because you want to…but because you have to. My relationship with my husband was never perfect but I can fairly say that we do our best to see each other as often as we could and as a rule, never argue over the phone or if unavoidable, never sleep until your discussion or argument with your husband is already settled.

At the Operating Room with my two OB

After the CS...thank God I can kiss you now Echo

     Last 08 July 2011, I think it was the happiest moment for my husband and me, aside from the day of our wedding of course. It is because it was the day that God bequeathed us the gift of life…our little angel Marco Quintin "Echo" Espiritu Fernandez was born at the AFP Medical Center. I couldn’t ask for anything else. I have my career, my friends, my parents, my husband and now, my son. God is really good all the time.

Glin Mar's First Daddy Hold

     It was just last November 2011 that I was encouraged to create my own blog page. I was pushed by a mommy friend, who happens to be the wife of my close buddy in PMA. Yes, she is also an army wife.

My very first post entitled "First time Blogger, First Time Mom"

     By the time I created my first post, I felt like I was also born to a new passion. And as I write my succeeding posts, I felt the urge to share my views as a naval officer, a daughter, a wife and a mother. Because, it is not only the soldier that lives with “stability under pressure,” WE, AS A MOTHER FOLLOW THIS CREED: BEING STABLE DESPITE ALL THE PRESSURES AND PROBLEMS IN LIFE, Because We Want to and We Have To.

My blog post for the Philips Avent Philippines Christmas Party

         

     My blog post for Healthy Options when I won in their online promo